Ending a marriage is a big step for any couple, but this is especially true for couples who have been together for years. Even if you know that your marriage is not working and that neither of you is particularly happy, you may not be ready to officially divorce. Perhaps, for financial reasons, you cannot afford to divorce your spouse, but you know you cannot stay married either. Or maybe, unbeknownst to you, your spouse was actually married to another person when you got married to him or her. In situations such as these, it may be worth looking into other options for your marriage. Wisconsin recognizes three separate actions for dealing with legal marital issues: annulment, legal separation, and divorce. Although they are fairly similar, they do have separate requirements and outcomes. 

Annulment

If you have your marriage annulled, you are asking to have your marriage legally erased, as if it never happened. Annulment is a process that is only done in very limited circumstances. To get an annulment, you must meet at least one requirement outlined in Wisconsin’s laws. Grounds that qualify for annulment include:

• You or your spouse lacked the capacity to consent to the marriage as a result of mental illness, intellectual disability, drug or alcohol use, or through the use of force or duress.

  ...

Getting a divorce is an end of what is usually a long and intimate relationship. Many people who go through a breakup or a divorce have difficulty coping with and accepting the end of the union. This can lead them to do things that they normally would not do. Unfortunately, in some divorces involving children, one parent might begin to use the children as a weapon against their spouse. This is known as parental alienation and it can be damaging to both the parent who is being alienated and the children who are being manipulated. If you suspect that your spouse may be alienating you, it is critical that you seek professional legal counsel to make sure your parental rights are protected. 

What Is Parental Alienation?

In many divorces, one spouse is usually more upset about the situation than the other. In these types of situations, one parent may begin to lash out and attempt to hurt the other parent in any way possible. Children are an easy target for hurting the other parent because of their emotional connection. The alienating parent can begin to use the children against the other parent as a form of revenge.  

For many divorcing couples, the well-being of their children is at the top of their list of priorities. Nearly every parent who has ever even considered getting a divorce has likely thought about how the end of their marriage will affect their children. Some parents may think that getting a divorce would traumatize their children, but studies actually show that most children adapt fairly well after divorce, as long as their parents put in an effort to create a loving and stable environment. Breaking the news of your divorce to your children is the first step in helping your children adapt to life with divorced parents. 

A Difficult Conversation

Although you may be dreading telling your children that you and your spouse are ending your marriage, it has to be done. Here are a few tips you can use when having that challenging talk:

It has often been said that marriages do not end overnight; they slowly deteriorate, falling apart over months or even years before they are considered to be “broken.” Some people recognize these signs of atrophy over time, although many do not, which is why it is not uncommon for situations to exist in which one spouse is completely shocked by the other spouse’s desire to get a divorce. Chances are, however, if your marriage is having issues, you can probably sense some of the tension. It is normal to go through periods of restlessness or unhappiness throughout your marriage, but how do you know when it is time to call it quits? There is no simple answer to that question; however, there are some common signs that typically appear in marriages that are irreversibly damaged, including:

1. You Have More Bad Days Than Good

Marriage can be hard work, and it takes a concerted effort by both spouses to make it last. You will experience some bumps throughout your union, but they should not cause you so much grief that you find it hard to function on a daily basis. Everyone has bad days from time to time, but if your bad days begin to outweigh your good days, this may become an issue. Studies show that happy couples have 20 positive interactions for every negative interaction, while couples nearing divorce typically have the same number of positive and negative interactions.

Getting a divorce can be stressful for many reasons, but one of the leading causes of this anxiety can be the financial side of things. While many spouses may experience financial difficulties during their marriage, these issues can also follow a person during and after their divorce. When you file for divorce, you must separate yourself entirely from your spouse. This can sometimes prove to be difficult, especially because many married couples have joint bank accounts, assets, credit cards, and other debts. Wisconsin is a community property state, meaning all assets, income, and debt are considered the property of both spouses and must be divided between them during a divorce.

Determining Property to Be Divided

If you and your spouse each acquired certain property before your marriage, that property will be considered separate, non-marital property that is not subject to division during divorce. Any assets or debts acquired during your marriage are considered marital property under Wisconsin law. All marital property, including assets you own and debts you owe, is subject to division between the two of you. However, there are a few exceptions to that rule. Wisconsin law states that any property acquired as a gift from another person or through the death of another person remains the property of the specified spouse, no matter when the property was acquired.